Thursday, December 4, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Faucet
My hands beneath the faucet with the water running, I begin to wonder whether the temperature of the water is rising or if my hands are just adjusting.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
"The Cultural Commission"
An excerpt from Charles Colson's book: "How Now Shall We Live?"
"The scriptural justification for culture building starts with Genesis. At the dawn of creation, the earth is unformed, empty, dark, and undeveloped. Then in a series of steps, God establishes the basic creational distinctives: light and dark. "above the expanse" and "below the expanse," sea and land, and so on. But then God changes his strategy.
Until the sixth day, God has done the work of creation directly. But now he creates the first human beings and orders them to carry on where he leaves off: They are to reflect his image and to have dominion (Gen 1:26). From then on, the development of creation will be primarily social and cultural: It will be the work of humans as they obey God's command to fill and subdue the earth (Gen 1:28).
Sometimes called the "cultural commission" or "cultural mandate," God's command is the culmination of his work in creation. The curtain has risen on the stage, and the director gives the characters their opening cue in the drama of history. Though the creation itself is "very good," the task of exploring and developiong its powers and potentialities, the task of building a civilization, God turns over to his image bearers. "By being fruitful they must fill it even more; by subduing it they must form it even more," explains Al Wolters in "Creation Regained"
The same command is still binding on us today. Though the Fall introduced sin and evil into human history, it did not erase the cultural mandate. The generations since Adam and Eve still bear children, build families, and spread across the earth. They still tend animals and plant fields. They still construct cities and governments. They still make music and works of art.
Sin introduces a destructive power into God's created order, but it does not obliterate that order. And when we are redeemed, we are not only freed from the sinful motivations that drive us but also restored to fulfill our original purpose, empowered to do what we were created to do: to build societies and create culture-and, in doing so, to restore the created order.
It is our contention in this book that the Lord's cultural commission is inseparable from the great commission. That may be a jarring statement for many conservative Christians, who, through much of the twentieth century, have shunned the notion of reforming culture, associating that concept with the liberal social gospel. The only task of the church, many fundamentalists and evangelicals have believed, is to save as many lost souls as possible from a world literally going to hell. But this implicit denial of a Christian worldview is unbiblical and is the reason we have lost so much of our influence in the world. Salvation does not consist simply of freedom from sin; salvation also means being restored to the task we were given in the beginning-the job of creating culture.
When we turn to the New Testament, admittedly we do not find verses specifically commanding believers to be engaged in politics or the law or education or the arts. But we don't need to, because the cultural mandate given to Adam still applies. Every part of creation came from God's hand, every part was drawn into the mutiny of the human race and its enmity toward God, and every part will someday be redeemed. This is the apostle Paul's message to the Romans, in which he promises that "the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay" (Rom 8:21). Redemption is not just for individuals; it is for all of God's creation.
Paul makes the point most strongly clear in Colossians 1:15-20, where he describes the lordship of Christ in three ways: (1) everything was made by and for Christ: "By Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible...all things were created by Him and for Him"; (2) everything holds together in Christ: "He is before all things, and in him all things hold together"; (3) everything will be reconciled by Christ: "For God was himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven." Redemption covers all aspects of creatin, and the end of time will not signal an end to the creation but the beginning of a new heaven and a new earth: God will make all things new (Rev. 21:5).
The lesson is clear: Christians are saved not only from something (sin) but also to something (Christ's lordship over all of life). The Christian life begins with spiritual restoration, which God works through the preaching of his Word, prayer, the sacraments, worship, and the exercise of spiritual gifts within a local church. This is the indispensable beginning, for only the redeemed person is filled with God's Spirit and can genuinely know and fulfill God's plan. But then we are meant to proceed to the restoration of all God's creation, which includes private and public virtue; individual and family life; education and community; work, politics, and law; science and medicine; literature, art, and music. The redemptive goal permeates everything we do, for there is no invisible dividing line between sacred and secular. We are to bring "all things" under the lordship of Christ, in the home and the school, in the workshop and the corporate boardroom, on the movie screen and on the concert stage, in the city council and the legislative chamber.
This is what we mean when we say a Christian must have a comprehensive worldview: a view or perspective that covers all aspect of the world. For every aspect of the world was created with a structure, a character, a norm. These underlying (God's words given in Scripture) and general revelation (the structure of the world he made). They include both laws of nature and norms for human life.
This point must be pressed, because most people today operate on a fact/value distinction, believing that science uncovers "facts," which they believe to be reliable and true, while morality and religion are based on "values," which they believe to be subjective and relative to the individual. Unfortunately, Christians often mirror this secular attitude. We tend to be confident about God's laws for nature, such as the laws of gravity, motion and heredity; but we seem far less confident about God's laws for the family, education, or the state. Yet a truly Christian worldview draws no such distinction. It insists that God's laws govern all creation. And just as we have to learn to live in accord with the law of gravity, so, too, we must learn to live in accord with God's norms for society.
The reason these two types of laws seem quite different is that the norms for society are obeyed by choice. In the physical world, stones fall, planets move in their orbits, seasons come and go, and the electron circles the nucleus- all without any choice in the matter-because here God rules directly. But in culture and society, God rules indirectly, entrusting human beings with the task of making tools, doing justice, producing art and music, educating children, and building houses. And though a stone cannot defy God's law of gravity, human beings can rebel against God's created order-and they often do so. Yet that should not blind us to the fact that there is a single objective, universal order covering both nature and human nature.
All major cultures since the beginning of history have understood the concept of a universal order-all, that is, except postmodern Western culture. Despite the differences among them, all major civilizations have been believed in a divine order that lays down the law for both natural and human realms. In the Far East it was called Tao; in ancient Egypt is was called Ma'at; in Greek philosophy it was called logos.
Likewise, in the Old Testament the psalmists speaks almost in a single breath of God's preading the sbnow like wool and revealing his laws and decrees to Jacob, suggesting that there is no essential difference between God's laws for nature and those for people (see Ps. 146:16-19). Both types of law are a part of a single universal order. John's Gospel borrows the Greek word for this universal plan of creation (logos) and, in a startling move, identifies it with a personal being-Jesus Christ himself. "In the beginning was the Word (logos)," which is the source of creation (John 1:1). "Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made" (John 1:3). In other words, Jesus himself is the source of the comprehensive plan or design of creation.
As a result, obedience to Christ means living in accord with that plan in all aspects of life. Family and church, business and commerce, art and education, politics and law are institutions grounded in God's created order; they are not arbitrary in their configuration. A school is not a business and shouldn't be run like one; a family is not a state and shouldn't be run like one. Each has its own normative structure, ordained by God, and each has its own sphere of authority under God. For the Christian, there must be no dichotomy between the sacred and the secular because nothing lies outside of God's created order. Our task is to reclaim that entire created order for his dominion.
The world is a spiritual battleground, which two powers contending for the same territory. God's adversary, Satan, has invaded creation and now attempts to hold it as occupied territory. With the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, God launched a counteroffensive to reclaim his rightful domain, and we are God's soldiers in that ongoing battle. "He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves" (Col 1:13). Redeemed, we are armed for the fight to extend that kingdom and push back the forces of Satan. The fighting may be fierce, but we must not lose hope, for what we are waging is essentially a mop-up operation. Because of the Resurrection, the war has been won; the victory is assured.
The history of Christianity is filled with glorious demonstrations of the truth and power of the gospel. Through the centuries, when Christians have lived out their faith by putting both the cultural commission and the great commission to work, they have renewed, restored, and, on occasions, even built new cultures. They have literally turned the world upside down."
"The scriptural justification for culture building starts with Genesis. At the dawn of creation, the earth is unformed, empty, dark, and undeveloped. Then in a series of steps, God establishes the basic creational distinctives: light and dark. "above the expanse" and "below the expanse," sea and land, and so on. But then God changes his strategy.
Until the sixth day, God has done the work of creation directly. But now he creates the first human beings and orders them to carry on where he leaves off: They are to reflect his image and to have dominion (Gen 1:26). From then on, the development of creation will be primarily social and cultural: It will be the work of humans as they obey God's command to fill and subdue the earth (Gen 1:28).
Sometimes called the "cultural commission" or "cultural mandate," God's command is the culmination of his work in creation. The curtain has risen on the stage, and the director gives the characters their opening cue in the drama of history. Though the creation itself is "very good," the task of exploring and developiong its powers and potentialities, the task of building a civilization, God turns over to his image bearers. "By being fruitful they must fill it even more; by subduing it they must form it even more," explains Al Wolters in "Creation Regained"
The same command is still binding on us today. Though the Fall introduced sin and evil into human history, it did not erase the cultural mandate. The generations since Adam and Eve still bear children, build families, and spread across the earth. They still tend animals and plant fields. They still construct cities and governments. They still make music and works of art.
Sin introduces a destructive power into God's created order, but it does not obliterate that order. And when we are redeemed, we are not only freed from the sinful motivations that drive us but also restored to fulfill our original purpose, empowered to do what we were created to do: to build societies and create culture-and, in doing so, to restore the created order.
It is our contention in this book that the Lord's cultural commission is inseparable from the great commission. That may be a jarring statement for many conservative Christians, who, through much of the twentieth century, have shunned the notion of reforming culture, associating that concept with the liberal social gospel. The only task of the church, many fundamentalists and evangelicals have believed, is to save as many lost souls as possible from a world literally going to hell. But this implicit denial of a Christian worldview is unbiblical and is the reason we have lost so much of our influence in the world. Salvation does not consist simply of freedom from sin; salvation also means being restored to the task we were given in the beginning-the job of creating culture.
When we turn to the New Testament, admittedly we do not find verses specifically commanding believers to be engaged in politics or the law or education or the arts. But we don't need to, because the cultural mandate given to Adam still applies. Every part of creation came from God's hand, every part was drawn into the mutiny of the human race and its enmity toward God, and every part will someday be redeemed. This is the apostle Paul's message to the Romans, in which he promises that "the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay" (Rom 8:21). Redemption is not just for individuals; it is for all of God's creation.
Paul makes the point most strongly clear in Colossians 1:15-20, where he describes the lordship of Christ in three ways: (1) everything was made by and for Christ: "By Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible...all things were created by Him and for Him"; (2) everything holds together in Christ: "He is before all things, and in him all things hold together"; (3) everything will be reconciled by Christ: "For God was himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven." Redemption covers all aspects of creatin, and the end of time will not signal an end to the creation but the beginning of a new heaven and a new earth: God will make all things new (Rev. 21:5).
The lesson is clear: Christians are saved not only from something (sin) but also to something (Christ's lordship over all of life). The Christian life begins with spiritual restoration, which God works through the preaching of his Word, prayer, the sacraments, worship, and the exercise of spiritual gifts within a local church. This is the indispensable beginning, for only the redeemed person is filled with God's Spirit and can genuinely know and fulfill God's plan. But then we are meant to proceed to the restoration of all God's creation, which includes private and public virtue; individual and family life; education and community; work, politics, and law; science and medicine; literature, art, and music. The redemptive goal permeates everything we do, for there is no invisible dividing line between sacred and secular. We are to bring "all things" under the lordship of Christ, in the home and the school, in the workshop and the corporate boardroom, on the movie screen and on the concert stage, in the city council and the legislative chamber.
This is what we mean when we say a Christian must have a comprehensive worldview: a view or perspective that covers all aspect of the world. For every aspect of the world was created with a structure, a character, a norm. These underlying (God's words given in Scripture) and general revelation (the structure of the world he made). They include both laws of nature and norms for human life.
This point must be pressed, because most people today operate on a fact/value distinction, believing that science uncovers "facts," which they believe to be reliable and true, while morality and religion are based on "values," which they believe to be subjective and relative to the individual. Unfortunately, Christians often mirror this secular attitude. We tend to be confident about God's laws for nature, such as the laws of gravity, motion and heredity; but we seem far less confident about God's laws for the family, education, or the state. Yet a truly Christian worldview draws no such distinction. It insists that God's laws govern all creation. And just as we have to learn to live in accord with the law of gravity, so, too, we must learn to live in accord with God's norms for society.
The reason these two types of laws seem quite different is that the norms for society are obeyed by choice. In the physical world, stones fall, planets move in their orbits, seasons come and go, and the electron circles the nucleus- all without any choice in the matter-because here God rules directly. But in culture and society, God rules indirectly, entrusting human beings with the task of making tools, doing justice, producing art and music, educating children, and building houses. And though a stone cannot defy God's law of gravity, human beings can rebel against God's created order-and they often do so. Yet that should not blind us to the fact that there is a single objective, universal order covering both nature and human nature.
All major cultures since the beginning of history have understood the concept of a universal order-all, that is, except postmodern Western culture. Despite the differences among them, all major civilizations have been believed in a divine order that lays down the law for both natural and human realms. In the Far East it was called Tao; in ancient Egypt is was called Ma'at; in Greek philosophy it was called logos.
Likewise, in the Old Testament the psalmists speaks almost in a single breath of God's preading the sbnow like wool and revealing his laws and decrees to Jacob, suggesting that there is no essential difference between God's laws for nature and those for people (see Ps. 146:16-19). Both types of law are a part of a single universal order. John's Gospel borrows the Greek word for this universal plan of creation (logos) and, in a startling move, identifies it with a personal being-Jesus Christ himself. "In the beginning was the Word (logos)," which is the source of creation (John 1:1). "Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made" (John 1:3). In other words, Jesus himself is the source of the comprehensive plan or design of creation.
As a result, obedience to Christ means living in accord with that plan in all aspects of life. Family and church, business and commerce, art and education, politics and law are institutions grounded in God's created order; they are not arbitrary in their configuration. A school is not a business and shouldn't be run like one; a family is not a state and shouldn't be run like one. Each has its own normative structure, ordained by God, and each has its own sphere of authority under God. For the Christian, there must be no dichotomy between the sacred and the secular because nothing lies outside of God's created order. Our task is to reclaim that entire created order for his dominion.
The world is a spiritual battleground, which two powers contending for the same territory. God's adversary, Satan, has invaded creation and now attempts to hold it as occupied territory. With the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, God launched a counteroffensive to reclaim his rightful domain, and we are God's soldiers in that ongoing battle. "He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves" (Col 1:13). Redeemed, we are armed for the fight to extend that kingdom and push back the forces of Satan. The fighting may be fierce, but we must not lose hope, for what we are waging is essentially a mop-up operation. Because of the Resurrection, the war has been won; the victory is assured.
The history of Christianity is filled with glorious demonstrations of the truth and power of the gospel. Through the centuries, when Christians have lived out their faith by putting both the cultural commission and the great commission to work, they have renewed, restored, and, on occasions, even built new cultures. They have literally turned the world upside down."
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
The Cigarette
He sits on the curb, feet flat on the street watching the widespread types of vehicles speed by with frequent honks of the horn. Rarely does he glance up to look into the eyes of those who pass by, those whose minds are far from his situation and whose feet are en-route to a million different locations within the city. Instead, his eyes just stare at the dust and trash-ridden gutter. His rough and dirty hands clutch a thin piece of cardboard upon which he had scribbled some incoherent plea an age ago with a dried-out marker. His make-shift sign and grimy clothes seem to only attract stares of disgust and indifference rather than the desperately needed pocket change of the wealthy businessmen which noisily bounces and collides within their pockets.
He closes his eyes and appears to those around him to have lulled into a sleep, but in actuality his mind is racing like a mouse caught by the tail in a trap. His ass feels as though it is glued to the cement when what he desires most is to get up and accomplish something. Fear grips him. How could he make it in a world that sees him as an animal? Where does one start to rebuild his life after years of a static existence.
Dismissing these stressful thoughts, he reaches into the pocket of his worn pants and pulls out a bent cigarette accompanied with a cheap lighter. He puts the cigarette to his lips and inhales as the flame sexually dances for the tobacco. The first drag goes down and dwells in his lungs for as long as he can stand. His lungs soak in half of the drag and expel the rest. His mind eases. Drag after drag, his thoughts start to cease their worry about his current situation and instead focus on the beauty of his relationship with that cigarette. The cigarette clings to his body in a different way than his clothes do. The cigarette seems as though it exists for him, it lives for him and it dies for him. It touches him and fills him in a way that he doesn’t experience otherwise. The cigarette loves him.
He closes his eyes and appears to those around him to have lulled into a sleep, but in actuality his mind is racing like a mouse caught by the tail in a trap. His ass feels as though it is glued to the cement when what he desires most is to get up and accomplish something. Fear grips him. How could he make it in a world that sees him as an animal? Where does one start to rebuild his life after years of a static existence.
Dismissing these stressful thoughts, he reaches into the pocket of his worn pants and pulls out a bent cigarette accompanied with a cheap lighter. He puts the cigarette to his lips and inhales as the flame sexually dances for the tobacco. The first drag goes down and dwells in his lungs for as long as he can stand. His lungs soak in half of the drag and expel the rest. His mind eases. Drag after drag, his thoughts start to cease their worry about his current situation and instead focus on the beauty of his relationship with that cigarette. The cigarette clings to his body in a different way than his clothes do. The cigarette seems as though it exists for him, it lives for him and it dies for him. It touches him and fills him in a way that he doesn’t experience otherwise. The cigarette loves him.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
September whatever
Hiatus end.
Tonight was Tulsa's huge "Fight Night" with attendance up to 3,000 people hosted by GUTS church. Anyone willing can sign up to be placed in a boxing match with three one minute rounds, all of which takes place in a real boxing ring in the middle of the sanctuary. My favorite quotes that surfaced in regards to this christian event are:
Quote 1:
Meredith: "How did they tie Jesus and Christianity into the boxing when you went last year?"
Attendee:" ....I don't remember."
Quote 2:
(quote received from one who participated in one of the fights as we discovered that the video of his fight was accidently recorded over)
"Now I don't have a video to put on youtube!"
You have to love the American Church. In fact I believe it is the easiest thing in the world to love the American Church, and you wonder why? The reason is simply because the American Church has BECOME American. With our: sweet lights, comfortable chairs, boxing matches, masturbation messages, and huge egos, who wouldn't to join the damn club? The obsession with dressing up a walk with Christ with marketable strategies and benefits makes me so irritated to an extent that is very difficult to express.
To glorify one's self, to make your church the "Bad-Ass that hosts Fight Night" negates what you say you believe. Please let us all put our eyes on Christ, stop making ourselves so glorious, because in the end, no one is good compared to Him.
We are all hipsters.
Tonight was Tulsa's huge "Fight Night" with attendance up to 3,000 people hosted by GUTS church. Anyone willing can sign up to be placed in a boxing match with three one minute rounds, all of which takes place in a real boxing ring in the middle of the sanctuary. My favorite quotes that surfaced in regards to this christian event are:
Quote 1:
Meredith: "How did they tie Jesus and Christianity into the boxing when you went last year?"
Attendee:" ....I don't remember."
Quote 2:
(quote received from one who participated in one of the fights as we discovered that the video of his fight was accidently recorded over)
"Now I don't have a video to put on youtube!"
You have to love the American Church. In fact I believe it is the easiest thing in the world to love the American Church, and you wonder why? The reason is simply because the American Church has BECOME American. With our: sweet lights, comfortable chairs, boxing matches, masturbation messages, and huge egos, who wouldn't to join the damn club? The obsession with dressing up a walk with Christ with marketable strategies and benefits makes me so irritated to an extent that is very difficult to express.
To glorify one's self, to make your church the "Bad-Ass that hosts Fight Night" negates what you say you believe. Please let us all put our eyes on Christ, stop making ourselves so glorious, because in the end, no one is good compared to Him.
We are all hipsters.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Screwed
Society is now screwed. Media is now screwed. Children are now screwed. I am now screwed.
I would like to do a study as to how many sexual advertisements, comments, allusions, or instances that we as an average American experience in one day. I feel so desensitized to what I used to find vulgar. It's almost as if we would have to go blind and deaf to "flee youthful lusts" as we are commanded to do.
My God, adultery is in my heart, but I no longer want it there. Where can I go to strengthen myself before returning to this ever-present temptation?
I admit defeat but thank you for your victory.
I would like to do a study as to how many sexual advertisements, comments, allusions, or instances that we as an average American experience in one day. I feel so desensitized to what I used to find vulgar. It's almost as if we would have to go blind and deaf to "flee youthful lusts" as we are commanded to do.
My God, adultery is in my heart, but I no longer want it there. Where can I go to strengthen myself before returning to this ever-present temptation?
I admit defeat but thank you for your victory.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
This Damned House
A man lives in a house, a broken and dark place. The wind moves through the cracks, whispers in his lonely ear only phrases. The sink within the house spews water only to send the dust that coats its white walls down the drain. The iron turns itself on only when the winter brings a chill to its spine. The staircase reaches towards the ceiling only to gain authority over all below. Even the dog which sleeps bedside only stays for the few pieces of kibble the resident gives it.
The resident, disgusted, realizes this house does its best to comfort itself and so little to comfort the resident. The resident shouts back at the wind's whispers: "When will the wind blow this damned house down?"
The resident, disgusted, realizes this house does its best to comfort itself and so little to comfort the resident. The resident shouts back at the wind's whispers: "When will the wind blow this damned house down?"
Monday, April 21, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Dreamt
I dreamt that I came up to this boy, and I could sense that he had demons in him. I can't really remember who was with me, but I was trying to prove to them that he was demon possessed by commanding the boy by saying: "If you have such-and-such spirit in you, in Jesus name I command your eyes to change color." Then the boy's eyes would slowly fade from dark brown to the lightest blue. Then I would repeat the same sentence and they would fade back to brown. The whole time the boy was real squeamish acting, like he didn't want to look me in the eye.
Interesting dream that occurred last night, thought I'd just kind of illustrate it.
Also, I was just messing around with india ink, and am growing fonder with this as I look at it.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
In such a place
I am not in love with God the way I want to be. I am on the brink of falling deeply in love with him, I can feel it, but I know I am not there.
It is so hard breaking the mindset that I have grown up with, about God and christianity. The mindset of rules: right-standing with God through a lack of sin.
I am so ready for this intense realization of Jesus Christ in my personal life, the realization of how he views me and what he did and does for me every single day. I feel like I've got this veil over my face, a screen that gives me a blurred vision of him and his plan/love for me and I cannot seem to lift it and view him for all that he is. I don't want to know what other people think of him, I don't want to fall in love with him because of what he has done in other people's lives, I want to experience this extreme revelation of who and what he is personally for myself.
I know what you've done for others, I just need some help seeing what you do for me. I want to love you the way I was made to.
I was reading the story of Blind Bartimeaus
Mark 10
46Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and his disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus (that is, the Son of Timaeus), was sitting by the roadside begging. 47When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"
48Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, "Son of David, have mercy on me!"
49Jesus stopped and said, "Call him." So they called to the blind man, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." 50Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus.
51"What do you want me to do for you?" Jesus asked him.
The blind man said, "Rabbi, I want to see."
52"Go," said Jesus, "your faith has healed you." Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road.
This story stuck with me, I had to read it multiple times. I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me about it.
I am in a state of Bartimeaus:
I am a blind man, I haven't seen what the Lord has and can do for me with my own eyes, I have only heard of what he has done for others. I don't feel it personally, like I want. When I hear of Jesus, and what he can do in my life, I start asking to see it, desiring an intimate life and experience with him. Once I call on him, my mind, and other areas of my life rebuke me, telling me to be silent, that Christ wont answer my plea. I think where I am having trouble is "crying out even more loudly" over the rebukes of my mind and this world.
I want more of him. I don't want to preach something that I feel so unsatisfied in my own life. I am not ready to be used as his tool yet. But I want to be ready.
I want to love you so that I can show people who you really are.
It is so hard breaking the mindset that I have grown up with, about God and christianity. The mindset of rules: right-standing with God through a lack of sin.
I am so ready for this intense realization of Jesus Christ in my personal life, the realization of how he views me and what he did and does for me every single day. I feel like I've got this veil over my face, a screen that gives me a blurred vision of him and his plan/love for me and I cannot seem to lift it and view him for all that he is. I don't want to know what other people think of him, I don't want to fall in love with him because of what he has done in other people's lives, I want to experience this extreme revelation of who and what he is personally for myself.
I know what you've done for others, I just need some help seeing what you do for me. I want to love you the way I was made to.
I was reading the story of Blind Bartimeaus
Mark 10
46Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and his disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus (that is, the Son of Timaeus), was sitting by the roadside begging. 47When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"
48Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, "Son of David, have mercy on me!"
49Jesus stopped and said, "Call him." So they called to the blind man, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." 50Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus.
51"What do you want me to do for you?" Jesus asked him.
The blind man said, "Rabbi, I want to see."
52"Go," said Jesus, "your faith has healed you." Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road.
This story stuck with me, I had to read it multiple times. I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me about it.
I am in a state of Bartimeaus:
I am a blind man, I haven't seen what the Lord has and can do for me with my own eyes, I have only heard of what he has done for others. I don't feel it personally, like I want. When I hear of Jesus, and what he can do in my life, I start asking to see it, desiring an intimate life and experience with him. Once I call on him, my mind, and other areas of my life rebuke me, telling me to be silent, that Christ wont answer my plea. I think where I am having trouble is "crying out even more loudly" over the rebukes of my mind and this world.
I want more of him. I don't want to preach something that I feel so unsatisfied in my own life. I am not ready to be used as his tool yet. But I want to be ready.
I want to love you so that I can show people who you really are.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
For Sale
I'm not sold on this drawing, but I think I am going to continue to pursue this type of line work.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
This Revolution is For Display Purposes Only
I try to keep this blog quote-free, but I discovered that my words fail me, and sometimes, others translate my thoughts to the perfect choice of words:
"On a Tuesday night in the summer I tried to paint a train bridge that spans Portobello Road in West London with posters showing the revolutionary icon Che Guevara gradually dribbling off the page. Every Saturday the market underneath sells Che Guevara t-shirts, handbags, baby bibs and button badges. I think I was trying to make a statement about the endless recycling of an icon. People always seem to think if they dress like a revolutionary they don't actually have to behave like one.
I got up on the bridge about 4 AM. It was quiet and peaceful until two cars approached very slowly and parked on the street. I stopped pasting and watched from the side of the bridge through the bushes. After a few minutes there was no movement and I figured it was cool to carry on.
I reached the fifth poster when there was a huge bang and the sound of splitting wood. One of the cars had reversed back up the street and was on the pavement, wedged in the doorway of the mobile phone shop. Six small figures in hoods with scarves on their faces ran into the store throwing everything they could into black plastic bags. In less than a minute they were all back in their cars which screamed down Portobello Road beneath me. I stood there with my mouth hanging open, a bucket in one hand and a sawn-off sweeping brush in the other, the only young male in sportswear now within a mile of the store. I got the feeling things would look bad for me if I hung around so I dropped the bucket, climbed the fence and jumped to the street.
The area was full of cameras so I lowered my head, pulled my hood up and ran all the way to the canal. I imagined kids were probably in Kilburn by then, lighting up a spliff and saying to each other 'Why would someone just paint pictures of a revolutionary when you can actually behave like one instead?'"
-Banksy
God Help Us.
"On a Tuesday night in the summer I tried to paint a train bridge that spans Portobello Road in West London with posters showing the revolutionary icon Che Guevara gradually dribbling off the page. Every Saturday the market underneath sells Che Guevara t-shirts, handbags, baby bibs and button badges. I think I was trying to make a statement about the endless recycling of an icon. People always seem to think if they dress like a revolutionary they don't actually have to behave like one.
I got up on the bridge about 4 AM. It was quiet and peaceful until two cars approached very slowly and parked on the street. I stopped pasting and watched from the side of the bridge through the bushes. After a few minutes there was no movement and I figured it was cool to carry on.
I reached the fifth poster when there was a huge bang and the sound of splitting wood. One of the cars had reversed back up the street and was on the pavement, wedged in the doorway of the mobile phone shop. Six small figures in hoods with scarves on their faces ran into the store throwing everything they could into black plastic bags. In less than a minute they were all back in their cars which screamed down Portobello Road beneath me. I stood there with my mouth hanging open, a bucket in one hand and a sawn-off sweeping brush in the other, the only young male in sportswear now within a mile of the store. I got the feeling things would look bad for me if I hung around so I dropped the bucket, climbed the fence and jumped to the street.
The area was full of cameras so I lowered my head, pulled my hood up and ran all the way to the canal. I imagined kids were probably in Kilburn by then, lighting up a spliff and saying to each other 'Why would someone just paint pictures of a revolutionary when you can actually behave like one instead?'"
-Banksy
God Help Us.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Camp Band Pics and One New Drawing
I drew something new today.
one of the many pictures that joey took of the "blu camp band" this morning. This one was my favorite.
I drew something new today.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Large Drawings
It has been too long to remain postless, so now I will put up what is on my wall and you can decide what you like or dislike.
Basically, when I draw something in my drawing class, regardless of whether I think it is cool or good quality, I come home and hang it on my bedroom wall. I've discovered that after doing this, I can meditate on them and decide what I like and dislike.
I'd like feedback if you wouldn't mind.
http://www.juxtapoz.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=2490
I love this guy's work.
God help us.
Basically, when I draw something in my drawing class, regardless of whether I think it is cool or good quality, I come home and hang it on my bedroom wall. I've discovered that after doing this, I can meditate on them and decide what I like and dislike.
I'd like feedback if you wouldn't mind.
http://www.juxtapoz.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=2490
I love this guy's work.
God help us.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Friday, February 8, 2008
Passivism Resulting in Revolution
I got all “hot and bothered” today.
Let me begin by saying that this, however, will not become a complain-and-cry blog entry.
A few weeks ago, during my typographic design class, my professor was strolling around the room gazing upon the varied level of skill and different styles of every student’s logo designs (Now, I’m sure you can imagine the difference of skill and style that would appear in a computer lab at Amarillo College. You’ve got your lovers of the font “Papyrus” coated in a vomit colored yellow with a thick purple stroke all the way to the designer with gauges in his ears that a baby could stick his fist through who loves any font that resembles Nine Inch Nails’ album art). Upon arriving at my computer and taking a gaze at my monitor, my teacher announces: “You don’t need that part there. It is too odd, and doesn’t go along with what is popular right now. You can have your own aesthetic, but you need to stay within the bounds of what works today.” (Another side note: this is the same professor who proclaimed his love for pushing students out of their box (design-wise), daring us to be different from what we see today). I responded that I was in a state of trying to develop my art in a way that is progressively different, but not so far out of reach of today’s style.”
Today, the class gathered around, and critiqued each other’s designs. The professor selected four students to pick their favorites out of the twenty-four presented. Three out of five of my designs were picked as a “favorite.” During the course of the critiques, many of my peers exploded with critical responses to my designs, claiming that it was too experimental. My teacher also added: “Some of you are too interested with being new and innovative when I think that you need to look at what is working today, in our world, and copy that. What’s wrong with two words placed together in the font Helvetica? After all, you are students, not professionals. You should be copying what you see is successful.”
Needless to say, this struck me as quite offensive, but at the same time, quite revelatory. This situation, I theorized, mirrors our world and society. We, as Americans (I cannot speak for another nation which I have not experienced the culture) are taught to love revolution. George Washington, a hero, father of the American revolution. Martin Luther King Jr., a hero, revolutionary voice of equality. Jesus Christ, our savior, revolutionary in the concept of who God is and religion throughout the world. After we are taught to idolize these figures, we are also taught to be nothing like them. Our society professes it’s love for these figures of our past and the benefits they bring, but shuns any innovation that surfaces today.
In no way am I considering myself to be revolutionary in my design of logos for my class at the local community college, but I am saying that I wish people would catch onto more of a passionate and progressive mindset that says: “Our world doesn’t have to stay in a state of Helvetica, dark and unchanging.”
I would like to thank Amarillo College for everything I learn about our world.
God help us.
Let me begin by saying that this, however, will not become a complain-and-cry blog entry.
A few weeks ago, during my typographic design class, my professor was strolling around the room gazing upon the varied level of skill and different styles of every student’s logo designs (Now, I’m sure you can imagine the difference of skill and style that would appear in a computer lab at Amarillo College. You’ve got your lovers of the font “Papyrus” coated in a vomit colored yellow with a thick purple stroke all the way to the designer with gauges in his ears that a baby could stick his fist through who loves any font that resembles Nine Inch Nails’ album art). Upon arriving at my computer and taking a gaze at my monitor, my teacher announces: “You don’t need that part there. It is too odd, and doesn’t go along with what is popular right now. You can have your own aesthetic, but you need to stay within the bounds of what works today.” (Another side note: this is the same professor who proclaimed his love for pushing students out of their box (design-wise), daring us to be different from what we see today). I responded that I was in a state of trying to develop my art in a way that is progressively different, but not so far out of reach of today’s style.”
Today, the class gathered around, and critiqued each other’s designs. The professor selected four students to pick their favorites out of the twenty-four presented. Three out of five of my designs were picked as a “favorite.” During the course of the critiques, many of my peers exploded with critical responses to my designs, claiming that it was too experimental. My teacher also added: “Some of you are too interested with being new and innovative when I think that you need to look at what is working today, in our world, and copy that. What’s wrong with two words placed together in the font Helvetica? After all, you are students, not professionals. You should be copying what you see is successful.”
Needless to say, this struck me as quite offensive, but at the same time, quite revelatory. This situation, I theorized, mirrors our world and society. We, as Americans (I cannot speak for another nation which I have not experienced the culture) are taught to love revolution. George Washington, a hero, father of the American revolution. Martin Luther King Jr., a hero, revolutionary voice of equality. Jesus Christ, our savior, revolutionary in the concept of who God is and religion throughout the world. After we are taught to idolize these figures, we are also taught to be nothing like them. Our society professes it’s love for these figures of our past and the benefits they bring, but shuns any innovation that surfaces today.
In no way am I considering myself to be revolutionary in my design of logos for my class at the local community college, but I am saying that I wish people would catch onto more of a passionate and progressive mindset that says: “Our world doesn’t have to stay in a state of Helvetica, dark and unchanging.”
I would like to thank Amarillo College for everything I learn about our world.
God help us.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Something vs Someone
Our society, including myself (until lately), is riddled with so much distortion. I'm finding it hard to sift through that which I should be a part of, and that which makes me a self-righteous bastard for denying. It's a thin line to walk.
David Ritchie spoke at North, Trinity's college ministry last night, and spoke about how judgement of others is a the root of most sin. This struck me. I judge people every day, whether I would be wasting my time if I invested any in them. Where is the ministry mind-set in that? After Christ gave us an eternal amount of grace, I decide whether people are worth anything? hmmm...?
Read Genesis 3:6- The fall of man could be considered to be before she eats of the apple, she actually judges whether she wants the knowledge of good and evil without having any idea of what good and evil actually is... Interesting, I know.
I have this lump in my stomach, a lump i cannot get rid of. It sits heavy as if I've eaten some indigestible object. "Become something, not someone," it shouts up my throat and into my brain where it echoes back and forth. "I'm working on it," I respond.
God help us
David Ritchie spoke at North, Trinity's college ministry last night, and spoke about how judgement of others is a the root of most sin. This struck me. I judge people every day, whether I would be wasting my time if I invested any in them. Where is the ministry mind-set in that? After Christ gave us an eternal amount of grace, I decide whether people are worth anything? hmmm...?
Read Genesis 3:6- The fall of man could be considered to be before she eats of the apple, she actually judges whether she wants the knowledge of good and evil without having any idea of what good and evil actually is... Interesting, I know.
I have this lump in my stomach, a lump i cannot get rid of. It sits heavy as if I've eaten some indigestible object. "Become something, not someone," it shouts up my throat and into my brain where it echoes back and forth. "I'm working on it," I respond.
God help us
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Another word and a few sketches
Blu tonight was thick with God.....Today was thick with God. I want to crave this intimacy, I'm praying that God would make this level of relationship with him my hunger.
God said this to me tonight at blu:
"I am going to open my floodgates in you and use you as my tool.
You are not going to be another Christian who tells stories from his past and ties it to a christian walk.
You will speak My words and My truth."
rejoice with me friends. I am very excited about where God is taking me in my life right now. Please keep me in your prayers.
P.S.
a few sketches i did today, i think i may add to them though.
i like this one a lot
God said this to me tonight at blu:
"I am going to open my floodgates in you and use you as my tool.
You are not going to be another Christian who tells stories from his past and ties it to a christian walk.
You will speak My words and My truth."
rejoice with me friends. I am very excited about where God is taking me in my life right now. Please keep me in your prayers.
P.S.
a few sketches i did today, i think i may add to them though.
i like this one a lot
Michael's Move to Tulsa
"I am going to start my work on you that I have already begun to stir inside you.
You are going to be formed and equipped with the skills you need to fully minister in the capacity that I have for you.
Everything you sacrifice in your leaving Amarillo, I will multiply as blessing back to you."
God's word to me on January 29th, 2008.
For those of you that still havn't caught it yet, Tulsa (ORU) is the next stop for Michael Rowley.
Honestly, I can't believe it. I have based this season of my life on things that are now just being set aside. What I can't believe even more, is the peace which is accompanied with this decision. I have put two solid years of my heart and soul into my band, now God asks me to set it down, but I have arrived at the discovery that, even though I had good intentions, the band had become issue of self-promotion and pride. I desired to "get signed," "have a draw" and be seen as a success in an industry that was hard to be successful. The band had become my identity. I WAS THE DRUMMER FOR THAT GOOD BAND. I'm coming to realize that that isn't God's plan for me, that was my plan for me....and now he is stirring me to pursue him, to start from zero, and to let HIM define who Michael Rowley is.
I will miss Amarillo.
God help us.
You are going to be formed and equipped with the skills you need to fully minister in the capacity that I have for you.
Everything you sacrifice in your leaving Amarillo, I will multiply as blessing back to you."
God's word to me on January 29th, 2008.
For those of you that still havn't caught it yet, Tulsa (ORU) is the next stop for Michael Rowley.
Honestly, I can't believe it. I have based this season of my life on things that are now just being set aside. What I can't believe even more, is the peace which is accompanied with this decision. I have put two solid years of my heart and soul into my band, now God asks me to set it down, but I have arrived at the discovery that, even though I had good intentions, the band had become issue of self-promotion and pride. I desired to "get signed," "have a draw" and be seen as a success in an industry that was hard to be successful. The band had become my identity. I WAS THE DRUMMER FOR THAT GOOD BAND. I'm coming to realize that that isn't God's plan for me, that was my plan for me....and now he is stirring me to pursue him, to start from zero, and to let HIM define who Michael Rowley is.
I will miss Amarillo.
God help us.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Cracked Head Drawing
A drawing I finished in class today...I'm no michaelangelo when it comes to realism, and my teacher is not the happiest about that. To appease him, I am trying to mix realism (his love) with pointed surrealism (my love).
Monday, January 28, 2008
Change
Change is, I have recently discovered, one of the more formidable foes I have to face. To step beyond my comfort, beyond what I know, and what I am used to is really proving a challenge. Nevertheless, I stand at the door with my hand on the knob awaiting the courage of my heart/brain to tell my hand to turn and my foot to step through that door. It feels as though stepping through that door may be as detrimental as I am imagining, and the grass really will "always be greener on the other side." At the same time, I cannot stop looking at my feet, they don't match my heart (or what I imagine is my heart's desire), and are cemented in place, static.
I can look back on my life and reminisce on past decisions to leave one thing for another and find some comfort, but it makes the decision making process only slightly easier.
I want to look into myself, find what MY heart is, not what my heart "should" be. I'm tired of living in the "should".
God help us.
I can look back on my life and reminisce on past decisions to leave one thing for another and find some comfort, but it makes the decision making process only slightly easier.
I want to look into myself, find what MY heart is, not what my heart "should" be. I'm tired of living in the "should".
God help us.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Banksy
Banksy is awesome, and you should buy me his new book Wall and Peace if you would like to make me happy....
Anyways, i enjoyed this short video, and thought you would too
"God loves ugly"
-Atmosphere
Anyways, i enjoyed this short video, and thought you would too
"God loves ugly"
-Atmosphere
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Sketches
Here are some sketches of recent that I was pleased with. Some of these I might be transferring to a different type and size of canvas....so I just thought I'd post them and get some feedback from my friends.
I'm wanting to stretch my art to new levels of creativity and depth.
If you are wondering what the sketch is, or what it means, don't ask me because i truly do not know.
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